May 19, 2008

Let's play "name that politician"

I've been thinking for awhile that Bristol's politicians need more interesting names. Nothing against Art, Frank, Ken, Cliff, Kevin, Ron, Bill, Tom, Mike, Craig and Co., but let's face it, these are not the sort of names that scream out EXCITING!
If we're going to have some fun with them, they need nicknames that capture their spirit, the essence of what they're all about, something that lifts them above the humdrum of the day.
For example, I've already decided that freshman city Councilor Ken Cockayne really ought to be called "Mad Dog," even though he is neither a dog nor particularly mad. It just seems like the right appellation for him.
Anyway, let's take a break from bashing unions, pleading for lower taxes and cursing incumbents and see if anyone can come up with a good tabloid sort of name for any of the politicos in town. The rules are simple: you can only suggest something that could be printed in a family newspaper.

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Copyright 2008. All rights reserved.
Contact Steve Collins at scollins@bristolpress.com

65 comments:

Anonymous said...

All hail "King Frank"

Anonymous said...

Kevin "Tell Me What to Say" McCauley

Anonymous said...

Ludicrous!!

I think that those that chose to serve the people AND are elected by the people should be treated with a little more respect.

We don't nickname our reporters (what a virgin and bountiful oportunity) and we shouldn't demean those that are working for us.

Anonymous said...

Ken "knee jerk" (guess which word is the operative one) Cockayne.

Anonymous said...

Frank "which cliche' or platitude shall I use today" or "which hand should I pat myself on the back with today?" Nicastro.

Derek R. Jerome, Sr. said...

10:12 I agree.

It is not an easy decision to run for, or serve in elected office. It takes a great deal of time away from family and work with little reward. Most people that do run and serve do so in the hope that they can make life a little better for their families, friends and neighbors that they represent. And as most of us hope, maybe we can make life just a little easier for our children and grandchildren.

So unless you have braved the shark infested waters of politics, or even if you have, please show some respect to those that have given of their time to serve the public interest.

While this post is supposed to be in good fun, negative comments are most hurtful to the families of those you attack. Please remember that.

Anonymous said...

How about Frank "my three ex wives and my three elected positions" Nicastro?

Art "It's my turn" Ward

Ellen "I'm smarter than you so I can cut the line" Zoppo

Kevin "public employees are numero uno" McCauley

Cliff "I raided the food stores at the Elks" Block

Ken "the bachelor" Cockayne

Mike "three chins" Rimcoski

Minor "I am not related to Lenin" Minor.

Anonymous said...

Jerome:
You're not going to serve in office, so don't worry about that. And I doubt you'll really be spending that much time campaigning either. You'll lose big and blame your "staff" and colleagues as usual.

Anonymous said...

Steve,

I'm surprised you've sunk to this new low. I thought you were more professional than this.

Steve Collins said...

Oddly, I've been regularly accused of sinking to a new low since my second day on the job as a professional reporter way back in 1987. So I can take it.

Anonymous said...

Art "I regularly listen to vocab improvement tapes" Ward

Anonymous said...

Derek "that's NOT a truck tire around my waist" Jerome

Anonymous said...

Steve, this is fun! It's not a new low at all. Too bad some of your bloggy readers/posters have little or no sense of humor. They need to lighten up and relax a little bit.

Anonymous said...

1:16

The readers can easily display a sense of humor, they aren't in the spotlight.

The person that mentioned family has it right. There are others involved who feel the pain also.

Besides, what is to be gained other than having fun at the expense of some one else?

Anonymous said...

Gerry "it wuz grate wile it lasted" Couture

Steve Collins said...

If Americans ever stop laughing at politicians, then democracy is dead. It's not disrespectful to have some gentle fun with people who willingly put themselves out there. Nobody made them run for office. And they know that jokes and barbs come with the job. Always have, always will.

Steve Collins said...

By the way, to the poster who called me "The King of Sleaze," I didn't mean to delete your comment. So there's the essence of it.
I wouldn't have guessed I held such a prominent title.

Anonymous said...

Well Steve it appears you finally hit bottom.

It's amazing how some think this is funny when it's not their name or reputation being batted around for all to see.

Anonymous said...

Some people don't have any fun!

Anonymous said...

Kosta "Don Juan" Diamantis

Anonymous said...

Dale "presto! more hair" Clift

Anonymous said...

I have better idea: lets play name that reporter!

Or, we can have people submit names and then we can try to guess which reporter is being referred to.

After all, reporters should be fair game too!

Anonymous said...

FRANK AND KOSTA HOLD THE RECORD ON WIVES. THE ONLY THING THEY CAN HOLD ONTO IS CITY PENSION MONEY.

Anonymous said...

Considering the trampling of taxpayers rights currently happening here in Bristol and NOT a single "leader" willing to stand up and protect them from the blight nazis , Aldolf seems appropriate for any one of them .

Seig Heil Bristol

Anonymous said...

I think it's a bad idea.

Anonymous said...

Tom "that is my real hair" Colapeitro

Anonymous said...

7:43 Then clean up your "pig Pen" and go back to Germany . Try to convince them that Nazism is alive an well. Name callers like you belong anywhere but Bristol. No one wants your "Pig Pen" attitude.

Anonymous said...

Easy - you have your First Name "Good Ole Boy" Last Names, and your First Name "Not a Good Ole Boy so I don't matter" Last Names.

Anonymous said...

Gary "do you really want to hurt me, do you really want to make me cry?" Schaffrick

Anonymous said...

Tom "my real hair got caught in the press" Colapietro.

Tom "I gave my old hair piece to Clift" Colapietro

Anonymous said...

~ Hey Steve, maybe we could play "name that blogger" and give the politicians a chance to take anonymous, nasty pot shots at the know-it-alls and naysayers! We've got that ridiculous "blight nazi" guy who insults everyone with his moronic nazi ramblings, and "CAPLOCK GUY" who seems to think that CAPLOCK makes his/her opinion superior to everone else's, or "union hater" who seems to think EVERYTHING is the union's fault, or that "namecaller guy"...
Hey, this could be fun! Maybe having someone hurl rude, mean and nasty comments in their direction would bring a new perspective to some of the bloggies...but then again, probably not. :-{

Anonymous said...

May 20, 2008 9:40 AM:

The subject here is "name the politician". If you have a problem with that don't read it or report Steve to the "Better Blogging Bureau" or what ever your tiny little government-groupie mind can think of.

Anonymous said...

May 20, 2008 9:40 AM:

OK Tom

Anonymous said...

Alex "the geek " blogger

Anonymous said...

Macobe " the phony " lover of Bristol

Anonymous said...

Joe "jelly head" geladino

Anonymous said...

Derick "Duh " Jerome

Anonymous said...

Gary "the Wannabe" Shafferick

Anonymous said...

Morgan "the pretenders" hard working movers

Anonymous said...

Hey 10:44 it ain't a Tom
Sorry lousy guess

Anonymous said...

Bill "Hamstrung" Hamzy

Anonymous said...

To 9:40 Great idea but these cowards would prefer to remain "hidden so lets call them all "Lost Souls"

Anonymous said...

"The subject here is "name the politician". If you have a problem with that don't read it"

So sorry 10:43, but since when does anyone on this blog stay on the subject? Sounds more like I stepped on someone's little "blight nazi toes." Don't be so quick to dish it out if you can't take it 10:43. ;-}

P.S. 10:44, I'm most definitely not "Tom."

Anonymous said...

Hey 9:44 In case you missed it that ain't Tom either. LOL

Anonymous said...

Ditto 12:08

Anonymous said...

Lets play name this Blog. How about we start with the "Bristol Hate Blog" ? Where people can hide who they are.

Anonymous said...

May 20, 2008 9:40 AM:

"or that 'namecaller guy'..."

Yes that's just one person alright! Certainly only one "guy" is guilty of that.

May 20, 2008 10:43 AM, another anti gov't, anti blight nazi guy said...

May 20, 2008 12:08 PM:

Sorry, by calling someone "blight nazi guy" I thought you were referring to the one who's all worked up about the "blight nazis". I didn't think it was the "anti-blight-nazi guy" (you).

PS I'm not a blight nazi, I'm sort of an anti-blight-nazi (like you)

Anonymous said...

11:59 You could at least spell his name right !Even I can spell that.

Anonymous said...

5:50 am Make some sense will you ?And clean up your act er mess !!

Anonymous said...

Some people on here like to call other people names at their expense because they can dish it out cowardly and anonymously. And they obviously can't take it either.

Anonymous said...

Howabout "I love Jody not Rowland any more" Hamzy ?

Anonymous said...

Art " the Republican Hack" Mocabe

Anonymous said...

Judging by the budget meeting maybe " We won't agree until we can raise your taxes " (insert surname here ) would be applicable.

Anonymous said...

May 19, 2008 9:41 AM (the first post):

You mean Nicastro or Johnson?

Anonymous said...

Ron "Balk him in" Burns

Chris "Son of Sam" Wright

Anonymous said...

"Some people on here like to call other people names at their expense because they can dish it out cowardly and anonymously."

Would that be cowardly and anonymously...like you?

Anonymous said...

8:21 Wanna meet ? Coward!

Anonymous said...

Jonathan "Biggest Loser I" Rosenthal and Glenn "Biggest Loser II" Klocko. If these two started a diet today, who would win the title? Neither is a Bristol resident, but Glenn gets to control our tax increases and our Mayor - hand than man a trophy (or a treadmill?)

Anonymous said...

"8:21 Wanna meet ? Coward!"

Thanks for the invite, but HELL NO...I think you're kinda nuts!

Anonymous said...

Derek is concerned about people not respecting potential politicians.

How about.........

Derek "Do as I say not as I do" Jerome?

Anonymous said...

May 21, 2008 5:17 AM:

Why you think you're some kind of bad-ass? Be careful for what you ask for.

Why don't YOU post your really name instead of hypocritically calling someone a coward for not doing so?

Anonymous said...

May 21, 2008 9:19 AM:

ditto!

Anonymous said...

Whatsa matter 5:17 can't take a dose of your own trash ?

Anonymous said...

one more:

Derek "I'm the new Kosta with the ladies" Jerome